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Admitting I'm An Addict

In my never ending process of trying to get sober, I am leaving this post open for everyone to see. I'm opening up this part of my life and prepared for what happens. I need to get and stay sober. This has been going on for 9 months. I need to find the key to unlock my sobriety. Get my life back on track.

What started my downfall into my drinking problem...my health. When I was diagnosed by my personal doctor with MS, my heart just sank. It was something I was expecting. The dizzy spells, memory gaps, trouble walking, etc. When I was refered to a neurologist and tests came back negative, I got so depressed. I felt like I was given up after I was cut lose. I began to knock back sips of champagne daily.

For years I've dealt with a sick grandmother. You just didn't know what was going to happen day to day. One time, she was sent to the hospital and I lost it. I started with a 6 pack of Miller Lite and drank 2 to 3 bottles every other night. One time I got drunk when I was by myself taking care of her. Because I drop things so easily, I was helpless taking care of her. Instead of staying sober, I got drunk in a matter of minutes.

After she passed away, I stayed sober for a week for her funeral. Not sure how I did it. I began knocking back Heineken's like crazy after that. I could easily go through a 12 pack in one day. I begged my family to help me maintain sobriety. Asked them to even support me through AA meetings. They couldn't do that. I stayed sober for one month. Wow!!! Since then, polish off whatever I can get my hands on. Getting drunk 2 to 3 times a week. Things just started to get worse for me personally in the past few days. Back heavily knocking drinks back.

I was even taking hard drugs at one point. Three weeks clean off them.

I am an alcoholic in every way. I want to get and maintain sobriety. It's not like quitting smoking. There is no quick fix. I sometimes wish I could call my cousin and see how he's doing on getting clean and sober. Talk to someone who is going through the same thing. I need to find the magic key to get help.

True Pisces

Bored on a Saturday Night

You Are a Yellow Crayon

Your world is colored with happy, warm, fun colors.
You have a thoughtful and wise way about you. Some people might even consider you a genius.
Charming and eloquent, you are able to get people to do things your way.
While you seem spontaneous and free wheeling, you are calculating to the extreme.

Your color wheel opposite is purple. You both are charismatic leaders, but purple people act like you have no depth.

This is me...for sure!!!

I Love NYC!!! I Love NYC!!!

You Belong in New York

You're a girl on the go, and LA's laid back lifestyle isn't really your thing.
You prefer a city that never sleeps, and people as ambitious as you are.
Cultured and street smart, you can truly appreciate everything New York has to offer.

You Have Gotta Be F**** Kiddin Me!?!

Seriously. You have gotta be f****n kidding me here. Here's the headline on aol.com.

Real estate tycoon Sam Zell finalized his purchase of the Tribune Company today, and he's wasted no time in making waves throughout the company's various properties. First, he stomped through the Chicago Tribune to energize the newspaper's troops against the rising tide of financial failure. Now, he's dropping knowledge on his plans for the sale of the Cubs, including one interesting caveat: Wrigley Field's naming rights will be up for grabs:
Tribune Co.'s new CEO Sam Zell said the Cubs will be sold by Opening Day, and that he may sell naming rights to Wrigley Field because such rights could be "extraordinarily valuable."

"Up until now, we've delayed -- although they're ready -- sending out the books on the Cubs until we had a better understanding of where this stands," Zell said. "I think the goal would be to complete the transaction before the beginning of the baseball season."
There are plenty of interested buyers, Zell said.

That's not all Zell announced. He confirmed that the State of Illinois and the Tribune Company have discussed a state purchase of Wrigley Field, discussions which are apparently ongoing. But the naming rights issue -- that's the real news here. Good luck selling this to Cubs fans. The bleacher bums embrace the history of Wrigley even as the stadium crumbles down around them; even minor fixes, like the addition of advertisements aimed to help the team financially, are balked at. So think of the backlash when a local restaurant like Portillo's (mmm, Portillo's) -- or worse, some national company -- swoops in and scoops those naming rights. New ownership better invest that money in riot gear.

Renaming Wrigley Field?!?! There are times I just get frustrated with the Cubs and management that I want to coverup my Cubs tattoo with something else. Regardless, I do love them and I can't picture myself without my tattoo. Really...would you be proud to be a Cubs fan if Wrigley Field becomes taken over by corporate sponsorship. Wrigley Field is Wrigley Field. Got it!!! Get it!!! GOOOD!!!

I'm So Proud to Be

You Are a Moderate Mama

You're not overly political, and your views fall more with the American mainstream.
In fact, it may be difficult for you to decide who to vote for at times!
Your approach to politics is reasoned and well though out.

Before I Head Off To Capping

By hook or by crook I plan on catching up with some Shep caps for Shepardville tonight...especially since I have the time.

What The Holidays Mean to You

For you, the holidays are about emotional connections and bonds. You are happiest being around those you love.

You celebrate the holidays in a minimalist style. You are likely to only give one great present and decorate your house with a few special items.

During the holidays, you feel happily busy. There's so much do to and not a lot of time to do it. But you enjoy every minute of your holiday chores.

You think the holidays should be nostalgic and sweet. The holidays bring out your inner child.

Your best holiday memories are of childhood foods and traditions. You secretly still wish you believed in Santa Claus.

What I Do When I'm Bored

and either don't feel like cleaning my desk or capping.

Your Kissing Grade: A-

You are truly an amazing kisser. Your kisses are extraordinarily mind blowing.
Whether you're naturally a good kisser or not, you've taken the time learn how to be the best kisser possible.
Anyone would be lucky to get a kiss from you!

My Handwriting

For the most part, this quiz has me mostly pegged.

(thanks P for the link to the quizzes)

What Your Handwriting Says About You

You are a fairly energetic person. You know how do pace yourself, and you deal well with stress.

You are very extroverted and outgoing. You are loving, friendly, and supportive. However, you are also manipulative and controlling at times.

You are balanced and grounded. You know how to get along well with others.

You don't a lot of space, and you prefer to spend time with others. You are a little nosy and intrusive. You sometimes don't give people enough space.

You are somewhat traditional, but you are also open to change. You listen to your head and your heart.

You are a good communicator. You work hard to get your ideas across effectively.

The Gas Stations...Love It or Hate It!!!

I just love the low cost gas stations. No really. Down the street the gas station says $2.75. You get on the interstate and you see a sign for another gas station that reads $3.09. What do you do? If the price is getting ready to go up .24, you want to save. Right. Fact of life that the gas price is going up. So you back track and head home to get the cheap $2.75 gas. On your way back to work, you start calling all your friends to get to the gas station asap or they will be paying for it later. Couple hours later on my way back home, I pass the same gas station. What's the price!?! Why it's $2.75...not $3.09!!! You just sit there saying a few swear words while shaking your head. You make the wonder decision not to purchase anything from them for awhile for that stupid stunt. I just wonder what the price will be tomorrow .

True story!!!